Tuesday, March 15, 2011

The Young Ones for Ghosts of Albion

Being sick made me think of the Young Ones episode "Sick" and that made me realize I had not posted my Ghosts of Albion stats for the Young Ones here yet.  So without further ado.

The Young Ones


Once in every lifetime
Comes a love like this.
I need you and you need me.
Oh my darling cant you see.

The young ones,
Darling were the young ones,
And young ones shouldnt be afraid.

To live, love
Theres song to be sung,
For we wont be the young ones very long.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=meioyAthGDw

(Character descriptions stolen from Wikipedia, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Young_Ones_%28TV_series%29 )

Rick: Oh no, the front door's exploded. Vyvyan.
Mike: Vyvyan.
Vyvyan: Vyvyan, Vyvyan, Vyvyan. Honestly, whenever anything explodes in this house it's always 'Blame Vyvyan'.


Neil Pye
Name: Neil Pye
Alias: Neil the Hippie
Played by: Nigel Planer
Type: Pacifist Hippie

Neil: Oh, look, I know, I know, why not put "boomshanka"?
Mike: Ahh... that's hard to tell, Neil. What does it mean?
Neil: It means "may the seed of your loin be fruitful in the belly of your woman".


Life Points: 25
Drama Points: 10

Attributes
Strength 2
Dexterity 2
Constitution 1
Intelligence 3
Perception 4
Willpower 4

Qualities
Hmm...he is the only one that cleans the house. Hard to Kill (though he does manage to get killed) 2, Natural Toughness.

Drawbacks
Emotional Problems (Depression, Severe; Fear of rejection, Severe), Bad Luck 3, Honorable 1, Humorless, Mental Problems (Delusions Sleep will give you cancer, Severe; Obsession pacifism, vegetarianism, Severe; Paranoia Deranged) , Outcast, Resources (Miserable),

Skills
Acrobatics 0
Art 2
Computers 0 (he hates technology)
Crime 1
Doctor 1
Driving 1
Getting Medieval 0 (Pacifist)
Gun Fu 0 (still a Pacifist)
Influence: 0
Knowledge 3
Kung Fu 0 (yeah)
Languages 1
Mr. Fix-It 3
Notice 3
Occultism 2 (only because he has a personal devil)
Science 1 (limited to Natural Sciences)
Sports 1
Wild Card

Neil Pye, the hippie, is a clinically depressed, suicidal pacifist, vegetarian and environmentalist working towards a Peace Studies degree. He is victimised by other housemates (especially Rick and Vyvyan) and forced to do the housework, including shopping, cleaning and cooking. He is never acknowledged for it unless it goes wrong.

Neil is pessimistic and believes everyone and everything hates him, a belief which is mostly true, though he does have some friends, two hippies, one also named Neil and one named Warlock. He dislikes technology (except for videos) and speaks out for Vegetable Rights and Peace. He is a chronic insomniac, believing that "sleep gives you cancer".

Neil wants the others to feel sorry for him, or even just to acknowledge his presence. His attention-seeking antics range from repeatedly banging himself on the head with a frying pan to attempting suicide. He claims that "the most interesting thing that ever happens to me is sneezing". This is because whenever he sneezes, it causes a large explosion.

In the second series his parents (who appear in the episode "Sick") are revealed to be upper middle class. They are conservative Tories who look down on Neil for starring in such a disreputable comedy series.

He also says 'heavy' a lot.

Neal in Modern Games: Neal is still living in the house and working on his Peace Studies degree. He does not know that the other guys have left, since they never told him, and thinks they just have been avoiding him for 25 years.


Rick
Name: Rick
Alias: Prick (the p is silent), The Peoples Poet, Rick the Complete Bastard
Played by: Rik Mayall
Type: Communist Bastard

Rick: Neil, the bathroom's free. Unlike the country under the Thatcherite junta.

Life Points: 22
Drama Points: 15

Attributes
Strength 2
Dexterity 2
Constitution 1
Intelligence 3
Perception 2
Willpower 2

Qualities
Is complete and utter bastard a quality? If so Rick has it in supernatural levels.

Drawbacks
Adversary (Vyvyan), Emotional Problems (Easily Flustered; Fear of rejection, Mild), Bad Luck 1, Mental Problems (Coward, Severe; Cruelty, Mild unless it is directed towards Neil then Severe; Delusions is charming and intelligent, Severe; Obsession Cliff Richards, Severe; Paranoia Severe; Zealot(communism, socialism, Rickism), Severe), Resources (Miserable), Talentless/Dullard

Skills
Acrobatics 1
Art 2 (he thinks its 5)
Computers 0
Crime 2
Doctor 1
Driving 0
Getting Medieval 1 (but it refers only the medieval police state he is living now)
Gun Fu 0
Influence: -2
Knowledge 2
Kung Fu 1
Languages 1
Mr. Fix-It 0
Notice 1
Occultism 0
Science 2
Sports 0
Wild Card

Rick is a self-proclaimed anarchist who is studying sociology and/or domestic sciences (depending on the episode). Rick writes poetry and calls himself "The People's Poet".

Rick is a hypocritical, tantrum-throwing attention-seeker who loves Cliff Richard. Rick tries to impress the others with his non-existent wit, talent and humour. He verbally insults (and often physically assaults) Neil at every opportunity. He fights and bickers with Vyvyan and often attempts to impress Mike.

Rick is also vegetarian and wishes all men to love each other like brothers. However, he rarely does anything that can be attributed to brotherly love.

Rick is portrayed as unlikeable and so self-absorbed that he believes he is the "most popular member of the flat" even though his housemates hate him (Vyvyan describes Rick's name as being spelled "with a silent P"). Despite the fact that the other members dislike and disregard Rick, at one point he is heard to say that they "really are terrific friends."

Believing himself to be the 'People's Poet' or the "spokesperson for a generation", Rick often greatly exaggerates or lies about his political activism and class background and is exposed in the final episode "Summer Holiday", when it is suggested he comes from an upper class, Conservative background.

While he perceives himself as an anarchist, he is actually very fond of ideals produced by Vladimir Lenin and Leon Trotsky and states his interests in them in several episodes. However, he claims to have a dislike of Margaret Thatcher, as is noted by his efforts to threaten her with a bomb in the eponymously named episode "Bomb." This is also noticed in "The Young Ones Book," first published by Sphere Books, wherein negative references are made to both Thatcher and The Conservative Party.

Rick speaks loudly and cannot pronounce his "r"s.

Rick in Modern Games: Rick died in 1985 before receiving his degree in a student protest march. Rick thought it was for an anti-Thatcher march, but it instead was to protest the replacement of Coke with New Coke in the student commons.
He is now haunting a castle in Scotland that houses a magic school.

Vyvyan Basterd
Name: Vyvyan Basterd
Alias: Vyvyan the punk rocker
Played by: Adrian Edmondson
Type: Anti-social Bastard

Vyvyan: What we need is a large consignment of very hard drugs.

Life Points: 49
Drama Points: 15

Attributes
Strength 5
Dexterity 2
Constitution 4
Intelligence 3
Perception 3
Willpower 2

Qualities
Fast Reaction Time, Hard to Kill

Drawbacks
Mental Problems (Anti-Social impulses, Deranged; Cruelty, Deranged; Obsessions, Mild; Paranoia, Mild; Recklessness, Deranged), Resources (Miserable),

Skills
Acrobatics 1
Art -1
Computers 0
Crime 3
Doctor 2 (he is pre-med after all)
Driving 2
Getting Medieval 4 (practically his middle name)
Gun Fu 1
Influence: 3
Knowledge 3
Kung Fu 2
Languages 1
Mr. Fix-It 2
Notice 1
Occultism 1
Science 2
Sports 3
Wild Card

Vyvyan is an orange-haired, mohawked punk rocker and medical student. He is extremely violent and regularly attacks Neil and Rick with pieces of wood, cricket bats and other large objects. He never harms Mike, whom he respects. He despises Rick more than he does Neil, taking every opportunity to insult and attack him. For example, when Rick, Mike and Neil meet his mother at a bar in the episode "Boring", he calls both Neil and Mike his friends, but not Rick, whom he refers to as "a complete bastard." Ironically, the antagonistic relationship between Rick and Vyvyan makes them all but inseperable; by a wide margin, the two spend more time together than apart or with the other housemates.

Vyvyan owns a yellow Ford Anglia, with red flames painted along the sides, and a Glaswegian hamster named Special Patrol Group ("SPG" for short) which he is very fond of, although SPG is also frequently subjected to Vyvyan's extreme violence. His mother is a barmaid and former shoplifter who before "Boring" had not seen Vyvyan in ten years and has no idea who his father is.

Vyvyan displays feats of inhuman strength on occasion (moving entire walls with his bare hands, lifting Neil above his head in a fight with Rick, biting through a brick and even being decapitated and re-attaching his own head), and eats just about anything; televisions, dead rats, cornflakes, or cornflakes with ketchup.

Despite being a homicidal maniac, Vyvyan seems quite sociable and creative; In one episode ("Flood"), he has developed his own potion to transform a person into an axe-wielding homocidal maniac (he claims "it's basically a cure...for not being an axe-wielding homocidal maniac...the potential market's enourmous!"). He has more friends than the others but apparently "he doesn't like any of them." He frequently causes havoc or damage such as wiring the doorbell to a bomb and adding a 289 CID Ford V-8 engine to the vacuum cleaner which proceeds to suck up the carpet, the floorboards and a friend of Neil's (the vacuum also prompted one of the few clashes between Vyvyan and Mike; when Mike admonished Vyv not to use it anymore, Vyv replied by calling him a "poof"). Disturbingly, Vyvyan also appears to be the only member of the group with a driving licence.

Vyvyan in Modern Games: Vyvyan became a very successful plastic surgeon.


Mike
Name: Mike
Alias: "the Cool Person"
Played by: Christopher Ryan
Type: Con-artist

Mike: Neil, have you upset the neighbors?
Neil: No, I've blown them up.

Life Points: 26
Drama Points: 15

Attributes
Strength 2
Dexterity 3
Constitution 2
Intelligence 4
Perception 4
Willpower 5

Qualities
Charisma 1, Criminal (Con Man)

Drawbacks
Covetous (Greedy, Desperate; Lechery, Serious; Ambition, Desperate; Conspicuosness; Serious), Mental Problems (Anti-social, Mild), Resources (Miserable),

Skills
Acrobatics 1
Art 2
Computers 1
Crime 5
Doctor 1
Driving 0
Getting Medieval 1
Gun Fu 2
Influence: 6
Knowledge 3
Kung Fu 1
Languages 1
Mr. Fix-It 2
Notice 4
Occultism 0
Science 1
Sports 2
Wild Card

Mike was the odd-one-out of the four. He is the assumed leader of the group, despite his diminutive size, and does not involve himself in the battles between the other three. He makes puns, which are either deliberately cheap or humorous but over-celebrated.

He frequently utters confusing, profound-sounding phrases which baffle the others (for example, when asked by Rick if he stole his apple, Mike replies "Well, if you're gonna sin you might as well be original."). Mike is supposedly the ladies' man of the bunch and brags about his prowess with women, although he is eventually forced to admit his virginity to the others in "Nasty." Though he is a virgin, as are the rest of the housemates, he makes every attempt at wooing the opposite sex, being quite forward and unsuccessful.

A con artist, he always has some kind of plan to make quick money such as renting out Rick's bedroom as a roller disco and soliciting bids for the unexploded atom bomb that fell into the house. Mike attends Scumbag College only nominally as he has blackmailed his tutor and the Dean of the school for grants and apparently passing grades. In "Summer Holiday" he muses "I think I'll ask for one of those Ph.D.s next year."

While Mike often does things at the expense or detriment of his housemates, he rarely expresses the sort of open hostility that the others do, and seems to cause them trouble only when it benefits him, rather than out of sadistic joy. He has, however, managed to nail his own legs to a table, and knocked Neil out during a game of cricket, albeit unintentionally. We only see violence inflicted on him once (at the end of the "Living Doll" video, when Vyvyan knocks him unconscious with a hammer).

Mike in Modern Games: Mike bought and conned his way to a seat on the House of Lords where he was instrumental in working on the committee to elect Mr. Harold Saxon.

2 comments:

Tim Knight said...

Simply mind-boggling ;) Love your "modern day updates" - I always imagined Vyvyan would become a senior police officer. Like the idea of tangling Mike in with John Saxon!

Anonymous said...

Ah, memories. Great writeup, sir.