Worst Movies Ever

I am participating in the Worst Movies Ever Blogfest.

Here is my list of the worst movies I have ever seen.
Now strictly speaking I like bad movies, but some are "so bad they are good" and others (this list) are "so bad and they are still bad". Generally I judge a bad movie by how much a headache it gives me.

Savannah Smiles (1982)
I don't know why I hate this movie, I just do.  Syrupy sweet, silly plot and dialog.  I saw it in the theater and was so bored I snuck out to play Space Invaders.  I guess the little girl in the movie later died of an overdose when she was 22.

Monster-a-Go Go (1965)
Not even MST3k could save this brainless movie.  Not only was it bad, the ending sucked and just pissed you off.

The Dunwich Horror (2009)
Pity poor H.P. Lovecraft.  Nearly every one of his stories put on the big screen sucked or was so far removed from the source material as to be unrecognizable.  This one is both.  Also pity poor Dean Stockwell as this was his second try at this movie and they both sucked.
This is LINO (Lovecraft in name only) and a made for Sci-Fi movie.  So the plot was weak and the story had the same names of thing Lovecraft talked about, but no where near what readers would recognize.

Gryphon (2007)
Sometimes a movie comes along that makes you reevaluate your devotion to fandom.  Gryphon is that film.  I love sowrds and sorcery movies, but this one is a chore to watch.  Bad CGI, no real plot and characters that I can't care about.   Yes it has Amber Benson in it and I am still a fan of hers, but even she called this movie "a paycheck".  I am also still fan of Sarah Douglas in this and even she couldn't save it for me.

Moscow Zero (2006)
I once had a roommate that claimed that if he ever saw Vincent Gallo on the street he would punch him in the face.  After this movie I am inclined to agree.  I watched this one a dare.  My father-in-law said it was the worst movie he ever saw and thought it would measure up to my regular fare.  It is pretty bad.  Not the worst mind you, but it is in my top 10 obviously.  Boring and most of it was in Russian.  In the end I hoped that it was the opening to Hell just so SOMETHING would happen.

Antichrist (2009)
Putting this movie on my list seems a bit like a cheat.  It's an indie film and sometimes indie films have to be judged on a different scale than other films.  Antichrist gets no fucking break from me though.  It is hard to actually sum up what I dislike more about this.  Is it the plot that seems to go nowhere? Is it the fact that I can't care even a little about these characters? Is it the implied long term child abuse and the fact that the mother let her child die? Is it that the big reveal at the end is "all women are evil!"? Hey if I am spoiling this for you, thank me, I wish some one had cared enough about me to tell me not to watch this. This movie is one of the few on this list that actually pisses me off.

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964)
Again this one might a cheat since it is so bad it is infamous.  Plus I get a certain kick out of this movie since my dad and I watched it to make fun of all the problems.  But really there are no two ways about this, this is a horrible movie and frankly I am sure stopped more than one family from celebrating Christmas in protest.

The Wicker Man (2006)
Not the creepy original, but the newer Nick Cage version.  This movie is so bad that I can't even begin to know where to start. Exactly how many women will Cage punch?  Hard to say, I have tried to get the memory of this one removed.
This is an example of the "tortured by his past" Nick Cage character, he only has so many he can do, so this is the same guy from "The Happening" (which also sucks, but not enough to make this list).

The Last Airbender (2010)
This might also be a cheat since it is so new and it is not bad so much as how much potential was waster.  The Nick cartoon Avatar The Last Airbender was by far one of the best American animation productions ever.  It had heart, comedy, plot and characters you got know and like and see grow.  The movie lacked all of that; traded for some tacked on crappy CGI and 3D.  Who can we blame for this?  Easy. M. Night Shyamalan. Also a study in wasted potential. "The Sixth Sense" was brilliant. "Signs" was...ok.  "The Girl in the Water" was a much worse movie than TLA, but I expected nothing from that movie and that is what I got it.  The Last Airbender had so far to fall and it managed to fall the entire way.  Fans of the series (like my wife and kids who got me into it) will understand when I say that the Ember Island Players would have done a better job here.

Alien: Resurrection (1997)
This movie is here because A.) it is bad, the script is just stupid, and B.) it shows how far a great series can fall.  Sure the later Superman movies of the 80s fell just as a bad, the stories were still Superman stories; that is they are stories you could have found in the comics (and they would have worked there).  A:R just sucks.   When I watched this movie it kept me from watching all the other Alien movies for years.  It even made me dislike Wynona Ryder, and have watched a steady stream of movies with her in the 90s so that was a feat.
This movie is just bad really and I feel bad for the actors having to be in it.

There are many more of course, but these are the ones most on my mind.

Edited to add: Seems the Linky script is broken.

The Secret Circle

I watched the new WB witch show "The Secret Circle".

So far it is not so bad, not great, but it has a lot of potential I think.
I'll be checking it out next week I am sure.

Zatannurday: Celebrating Monday

It might be Zatannurday here today, but we can also celebrate Monday!
In this case cosplayer Jettie Monday!

Visit her on her Facebook fan page here, http://www.facebook.com/jettiemonday

And here is some of her recent appearances as Zee.

Pathfinder Witch

I am reading through a bunch of playtest notes and it has occurred to me that I have never played much beyond 1 session of the Pathfinder version of the witch.

That is quite disappointing really.

New Charity at DriveThruRPG

I can't even begin to fathom this one.

There is new a charity set up at DriveThruRPG.  They do this every so often, RPG publishers bundle some items together and you get them at a reduced price and the money goes to the charity.  It is really a win all the way around.  You get a bunch of new PDFs, the charity gets money and the publishers and DTRPG get the benefit of the good karma.  I know I have bought things from publishers because of their past involvement in these.

But this one just leaves me speechless.

For $15  you get a lot of really good PDFs.  But more importantly The Wayne Foundation gets $15 to stop child sex trafficking.  That's right. Children being sold as sex slaves.  And you get to stop it.

Frankly I would have given them the money and not cared what was in the bundle.  This is so beyond my experience and thought process that my first reaction is that this can't be true.  But I am old enough and bitter enough at humanity to know it is true.

So please. Help out this charity.

Here is the link for the PDF bundle.
http://rpg.drivethrustuff.com/product_info.php?products_id=94966&affiliate_id=10748

Click on it to at least see what they are offering.

DCnU the new 52: Batwoman

Picked up the new #1 for Batwoman today.
First time I have bough a comic on the day it has come out in a really long time.

It is really good.

I like the team up of Kate and Bette. I like that Kate and her Dad still have issues.
I like the banter between Kate and Maggie.

The Top Bat makes an appearance at the end, but it obvious that this is not his story.

I think I'll continue to get this one.

My only gripe is Kate is WAY too damn pale.
I know that is part of her character identity, but it looks like she has been colored in properly.

Even when she and Bette were training it looked weird.

Speaking of that scene, this is my favorite part:
Bette: Uh Kate, where's my Flamebird costume?
Kate: I burned it.

Hope JL Dark is as good.

Modern Systems, Part 2

So.

I am burned out on Unisystem.  There are a few very good reasons that I just don't want to get into now, but the bottom line is the same.  I am burned out on it and what to try something else.

Not just play or run, but write about. Maybe even publish somethings for it.

I have had in my mind now for a while the idea that I want a game that would simulate modern supernatural/urban horror, and there are a lot of systems that can do this well, Unisystem at the top of the list really.  But I want to be able to do more with it and have something that I could if I choose, publish stuff for it.  So that rules out many of the systems that would otherwise be fine.
Also I want the focus of the game to change from "killing things and taking their stuff" or even "we are saving the world again, it must be Tuesday".

I am looking for something where people can play supernaturals or normal humans side by side with out too much of an issue.  A goal would be to have it be able to emulate any modern supernatural TV show or book you can think of.  Well, not Harry Potter, that is a different animal completely.

Here are my choices so far.

True20 - I am inordinately fond of this system.  It is easy. It is simple and it gets out of the way while playing.  I am not thrilled with levels, but I have an idea about that.  I have already done a lot of work with True20, both here and in some unpublished material that I can now use.  While it's support is also next to nothing and the fan base is thin, the rules are solid and I can use them thanks to the OGL.  Though one of the issues with True20 is that humans basically start at 1st level and a vampire or werewolf is much higher.  Plus there is no system of Drawback or Complications in True20 (though I have written one).

Fate/Fudge - Another open system with a lot of support.  I am just not overwhelmed with it.  I suppose I could go the route Icons did and use numbers.

ORCS - Jason Vey's system in Spellcraft & Swordplay. Flexible and has many advantages.  I would though end up making it look more like True20 in the end, which is why I put True20 on the list.

Mutants & Masterminds - Now this is an interesting choice.  Nearly everything I need is here.  The system is open and with Superlink I can even do more.  I would need to redo the magic systems a bit to be honest.  4Color/superhero magic and urban fantasy are not really the same.  It has the things I like in True20 and Orcs, plus it has a ton of support.

Savage Worlds - Not a fan of this system, even though it is good and has a ton of support as well.  Again, I'd need to redo the magic system to get it to my liking.

"Power of Three" - you have not heard of this one.  It is a system that I have been poking around with for a couple of years.  The name comes from the three basic abilities all the characters have, Body, Mind and Spirit.   Yeah similar to Tri-Stat, but the mechanics are different.  It is also based on the Charmed game I'd like to write one day.  Of course the system is perfect for what I want to do except for the little problem that it is not done.  It's not even in a playtestable shape yet. So much for that.

The one thing all these games have though is the means to support a lot of mini-campaigns or min-campaign worlds.
Here is what I have in mind. This is not all of them, nor are these even set in stone.

Generation HEX - the most developed of the three mini-worlds. Lower powered, kids in a magic high-school

Ordinary World - Supernatural creatures trying to live in modern suburbia and trying to blend in.  That doesn't always work so well.

Power of Three - My "Charmed/Witches of Eastwick/Rachel Morgan" homage.  Witches saving the world.

Daughters of Death - The children of the old gods are walking the earth again and not all of them have humanities interests in mind.  This includes the stats for the eponymous daughters.

Each world then would have additional rules to support their respective views.  So Gen HEX would need to scaled for magic school high jinks (Jinx High?), Ordinary World would need rules for hiding powers and suggestions for stories to tell.

One thing though, I am going to avoid using Lovecraft/Cthulhu type stories or monsters.  The exact thing that he was trying to do the werewolves, vampires and ghosts of a past age have now been done to his creations.

I'll keep thinking about this.