And now for something completely different.
It is no secret I am an atheist. In truth I am pretty much an anti-theist. So yeah I mostly play witches and paladins in my D&D games.
It should also then come as no surprise I find the following so damn funny and not for any of the reasons the group that produced it, The Jehovah Witness', wanted me too. Yeah I know, Gary Gygax was a Jehovah Witness, but he was "disfellowshiped". Not because of D&D but his hair was too long. Or so says the internet.
Thanks for crushing the imagination of a child you douchebag.
Anyway read more here:
http://sparlock.info/
https://www.facebook.com/SparlockTheWizard
https://www.facebook.com/groups/sparlock/
https://www.facebook.com/SaveSparlock
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBfthrsq2i0&feature=youtube_gdata
and of course why these people fear the internet,
http://www.bible.ca/Jw-internet.htm
Here he is,
Sparlock the Warrior Wizard, ready for your Pathfinder game!
Sparlock
Male Human Fighter 5 Wizard 5
LG Medium Humanoid (human)
Init +2;
Senses Perception +4
Defense
AC 10, touch 10, flat-footed 10
hp 74 (5d10+5d6+10)
Fort +7,
Ref +2,
Will +7 (+1 vs. fear); +2 trait bonus vs. illusion
Defensive Abilities bravery +1
Offense
Speed 20 ft.
Melee Heavy Shield Bash +9/+4 (1d4+2/x2) and
Flame tongue (1/day) +10/+5 (1d8+3+1d6 fire/19-20/x2+1d10 fire)
Special Attacks weapon training abilities (light blades +1)
Wizard Spells Prepared (CL 5):
3 (2/day)
Fireball (DC 17), Arcane Sight, Lightning Bolt (DC 17)
2 (3/day)
Scare (DC 16), See Invisibility, Acid Arrow, Burning Gaze
1 (4/day)
True Strike, Cause Fear (DC 15), Mage Armor, Charm Person (DC 15), Ill Omen
0 (at will)
Detect Magic, Light, Arcane Mark, Flare (DC 14)
Statistics
Str 15,
Dex 11,
Con 12,
Int 18,
Wis 14,
Cha 13
Base Atk +7;
CMB +9;
CMD 19
Feats Alertness, Arcane Armor Training, Arcane Strike, Arcane Vendetta, Combat Casting, Combat Reflexes (1 AoO/round), Craft Magic Arms & Armor, Dazing Spell, Eschew Materials, Persistent Spell, Scribe Scroll
Traits Resilient, Skeptic
Skills Acrobatics +7 (+3 jump), Appraise +9, Bluff +7, Climb +9, Diplomacy +11, Escape Artist +2, Fly +1, Handle Animal +5, Heal +8, Intimidate +14, Perception +4, Ride +1, Sense Motive +5, Spellcraft +17, Stealth -3, Survival +10, Swim -1
Languages Celestial, Common, Daemonic, Elven, Gnome
SQ diviner's fortune +2 (7/day), forewarned +2, opposition schools (illusion, transmutation), specialized schools (divination)
Combat Gear Wand of call lightning;
Other Gear Dwarven plate, Absorbing shield (1/two days), Flame tongue (1/day), 150 GP
Special Abilities
Arcane Armor Training Swift action: -10% arcane spell failure due to armor.
Arcane Strike As a swift action, add +1 damage, +1 per 5 caster levels and your weapons are treated as magic for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction.
Arcane Vendetta +2 bonus on damage vs. arcane spellcasters
Bravery +1 (Ex) +1 to Will save vs. Fear
Combat Casting +4 to Concentration checks to cast while on the defensive.
Combat Reflexes (1 AoO/round) Can make extra attacks of opportunity/rd, and even when flat-footed.
Dazing Spell You can cast a spell that dazes those injured by it (duration = spell's level in rounds, Fort negates).
Divination Diviners are masters of remote viewing, prophecies, and using magic to explore the world.
Diviner's Fortune +2 (7/day) (Sp) Creature touched gains +2 to attack rolls, skill checks, ability checks, and saving throws for 1r.
Eschew Materials Cast spells without materials, if component cost is 1 gp or less.
Forewarned +2 (Su) Always act in surprise round. Initiative bonus. Init = 20 at level 20.
Illusion You must spend 2 slots to cast spells from the Illusion school.
Persistent Spell Foes must succeed at 2 saves or suffer the spell's full effects.
Skeptic +2 save vs. illusion.
Transmutation You must spend 2 slots to cast spells from the Transmutation school.
Weapon Training (Blades, Light) +1 (Ex) +1 Attack, Damage, CMB, CMD with Light Blades
